Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
