thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
