Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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