when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
i just had sex bonerless
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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