His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
