I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
