She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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