If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
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