Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
