I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
