Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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