JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
