Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
