I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
