hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Randomize
