This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
