Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize