I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
