OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
