that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
they're like a gay fantastic four
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
