We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
