Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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