i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
