I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
