I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
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