Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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