Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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