Did you just see the Batmobile???
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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