I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
