You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
