I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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