So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
No subtext here. People are naked.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
