Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
