have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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