True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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