I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
