just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
