I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
