Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
