you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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