chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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