Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
