After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
another moral hangover. fuck.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Randomize
