God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
The power of my boobs compel you
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
