WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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