you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
