even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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