Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize
