He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
