Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Randomize
